(^_^)Gather round children,its Emrah time!!!

2007-02-02T15:01:00.000-05:00

i had a dream the other night....
goes a little something like this....

2006-09-12T22:58:00.000-04:00

Memoirs of A Teacha: Ch.8: home,sweet, home?

I've been back in Toronto for a few months now and I don't know where to begin.

My life is not what it used to be. I cannot believe how much has changed. I am forced to re-evaluate my life and the relationships around me, namely family. Japan has been such a surreal experience for me. It was a bullet train ride through the entire spectrum of human emotion. Just these blog stories alone can testify to that. How can someone be expected to go back to normal day to day living after such an experience.

Culture shock goes both ways apparently. I'm going through what is known as reverse culture shock. Reverse culture shock sucks big time. Its culture shock's evil twin brother's ,crazy ex girlfriend's , wicked step mother's, midget clown lover's, pet toad's festering wort!

Ok, its not that bad...but you get the point. Its sooo strange coming back to an entirely different life. I guess I should realize that change is an ever present theme in life. And as a human being, I should have the uncanny ability to adapt to such things. Chotto muzakashii, thats all.

A main reason for me coming back sooner then expected was to finish up university. Its my final year and if I can suck it up and put up with it, I'll be back in Nihon in no time. Remember,those music connex? I gotta go back. Decisions,decisions...At Uni, I'm taking an introductory Japanese language course as my elective. Casually speaking, I could rock that class. Formally, its a different story. Glad I'm learning it from an academic stand point this time. We'll see how much it pays off.

To all the loyal emrah(kento) fans that kept up with my journey, thank you all. This may be the end of "Memoirs of a Teacha", but the cartoon-esque life of me continues and is pushing its 23rd season. Here's a kanpai to you and that land on the other side of the globe, Nippon....

I wouldn't be surprised if a sequel of my accounts blogged its way into your hearts again.haha...

Until then, I'll blog here and there and hopefully bring ridiculous emrah insight into issues we all know and love.

Mata Ne,

Mr. Eko
^____^

2006-05-29T08:53:00.000-04:00

memoirs of a teacha. ch.7. sealed the deal for a future feel

This has become quite an annoying theme of the epic that is me. Once again, I must apologize for the tardiness in entering a new blog. Quite a lot has transpired so please bare with me.

I have been away from my country of origin, Canada, for some time now. I have experienced many a valuable thing and hope to share many more with you personally. As of late however, my situation in Nippon has changed. Due to extenuating circumstances beyond my control, I must return back to the T-dot post haste.

There have been many things I have hidden in these blogs. Many of which I have calculated into a puzzle of sorts. No one has been able to crack it. I will come clean. Some time ago, I was involved in a car accident. Completely not my fault but that's neither here or there at the moment. To make a long and painful story short, my car was completely obliterated and I was hospitalized for one day. After various tests and procedures, to the surprise of the medical staff, I sustained no significant injuries. At the time of the accident, I thought that leaving the next day for Toronto would be justified. Although physically I was ok, mentally it took a considerable effect on me. However, after numerous introspective discussions, I decided that I developed too strong of a bond with my students and thus decided to stay abit longer. But after hearing that my family needs me, I can no longer keep that promise to myself. Besides the company is kinda shit to begin with...

So, after everything has been said and done it looks like Kento Sensei is retiring early from the land of the rising sun. I definitely regret leaving so soon because living in the middle of nowhere has caused me to miss out on so many interesting opportunities Tokyo city life can offer me. The timing kind of sux as I was planning on moving into Tokyo this month to bartend and pursue my music more. But what can I say? Being the first born son comes with certain responsibilities. I must adhere to them. Besides, I'm only 22. The experience I have had here has given me valuable knowledge on making a sound decision of working/living in Japan in the future. I wholeheartedly know the conditions that must be met before I move here again. Its not a complete write off. I have had some great experiences which my blogs can validate. There are so many things I have experienced here both good and bad that cannot be expressed through mere words. Just wait till we talk in person. One cool thing as of late is how I sealed the deal for a future feel regarding my music. I met these two rising J pop stars who frequently perform outside of Yokohama station. They invited me to jam with them and the audience response was just spectacular. Their manager approached me and is very much interested in helping my music get exposed here. So hopefully I will be back sooner then later to make something of this crazy obsession I have with music. I have so many pictures (most from my celly.cant believe I didn't get a digital camera here.argh!!!). I will post them in due time.

Mata ne on June __, 2006
Namyo Tnek Harme

2006-04-24T23:21:00.000-04:00

Memoirs of a Teacha-ch.6- River of Dreams

Hey,hey,hey true believers. Its your friendly neighborhood Emrah coming at ya straight from Japan. I'm approaching the 5 month point of my voyage and let me tellz ya,it ain't at all what I thought it would be. Throw everything you know about Japan away. Sure,it helps if you know the basics but everyone will have their own,unique subjective experience here. Everything is going by so quickly. It feels like I am in a raging river, racing past and through all these surreal experiances. I only hope that my blogs shed a little light on what it can be like for a foreigner living in Nippon. My only regret is not writing every single detail of my alias', kento's life. As mentioned, before this blog must remain a PG-13 account. I've painted quite an interesting, exciting, sweet picture of things here haven't I? However, not everything is kosher so if you are interested in knowing various other expects concerning my Japanese life, please feel free to email moi with your inquires.

This past weekend I ventured up into an area known as Hakone. My Japanese teachers took Aaron and myself on this trip to an onsen (hot spring) resort near Mt. Fuji. Finally, I was doing tourist stuff. During the day, we explored the town, took pictures, bought souvenirs, and ate onsen boiled, blackened eggs (yum!). At night, we settled into a ryokan(a traditional Japanese inn). As with most social gatherings in Japan, drinking was a necessity. And boy did we drink. After our final onsen bath, that mischievous adventurous spirit in me started to awaken. I realized that I left my guitar in the rental van outside but the doors to the hotel were locked up for the evening. I quickly dawned on my yukata kimono) and slipped into the night a'la ninja style. It was quite a mission, being all stealthy, leaping from one tree to to the next,sliding down roof tops, tiptoeing past open windows but I made it. Nothing like a drunken ninja mission to illustrate one's affinity for music. Here are some pix from the trip including a ninja shot.

As I'm writing this, I am realizing just how eerily quiet my house has become. Oh that's right. You don't know do you? Well, I am living by myself now. I have been for the past couple weeks. Agent Smith decided to bail out on the company. Like most people, he didn't believe certain business ethics were satisfactory. To save himself from any potential damages he may have to pay for breaking the contract, he just packed his stuff and bounced one morning, leaving me as the sole inhabitant of this big, scary, Japanese house. Actually, its not that bad. The house is cleaner now that it doesn't have Smith's trademark stench of mustard and onions. It is lonely at times sure, but I like to think of me being able to cook naked is some sweet justification. With Smith's departure, I took the opportunity to move upstairs into the bigger bedroom. My first night was kept awake with random earthquakes but now I think I feel safer (cause I got that helmet).

Remember about me joining up with 3 Japanese guys and their band? Well it happened last Tuesday and it was nothing short of stellar. I haven't been in a band for the longest time. Now, having had vocal experience and training, I felt as if there was nothing I couldn't sing as their frontman. Its simply for fun at this stage but if the audience responds this well each time, who knows?

In terms of work, it has gotten pretty hectic lately. More then usual. I am the only full time teacher left. The company doesn't seem to treat me as bad as others. Nonetheless, I do have some quarrels with certain legalities of the work. One thing is for certain. My bond with my students. I was afraid that I would develop a strong one, and sure enough I did. They are all great kids and I really must start blogging about individuals soon. A zoo trip is coming up next month.

Next week is Golden Week, a week holiday free of work for all of Japan. It is a crazy time to be traveling here. I am definitely coming back to Toronto before my contract ends. So, I must try to fit in all the touristy stuff while I have time. The destination: Fukuoka( known for its ramen noodles and delicious horse meat!?). The team:Kento-san, Aron-san and I'm sure a host of other weird wonderful characters we'll meet along the way. Hopefully, we will be able to come back up via Hiroshima, and Osaka. The next chapter,Golden Week should be a doozy.

Some Random pix:

Now why doesn't the rest of the world call a toilet this?
The objectification of school girls make me sick. Dear, Santa...

I thought this was kind of funny because I was expecting to see other caricature race masks. After not seeing any other ethnicities, I realized that its done in really bad taste.

Wake me up,
Emrah

2006-03-23T20:25:00.000-05:00

Memoirs of a Teacha-Ch.5- The Social Samurai

I'm back!!! Its been little over a month and although my blogging has been out of commission, the saga that is Emrah continues. As I write this, I am looking out a window at a single Sakura tree and can't help but contemplate a striking comparison with the saga of Emrah. Japanese society values aesthetics and presentation above many things. It is no wonder that the Sakura tree with its haunting majesty and creamy, pinkish cherry blossoms is held in high regard here. It is truly a beautiful sight to witness. The Sakura tree is just branches for the majority of the year. But around this time, it blossoms and is in full bloom for only 2 weeks. The wait is justified. Similarly, the chronicles of EMURA take some time to bloom. The wait will be justified...
So make yourself comfortable, light some candles, and pour yourself that favorite drink because it is now officially time to Emrah!

I must confess. A main reason why it has taken so long to blog is because I feel I can't deliver interesting accounts of my adventures anymore. Being in a country that does not primarily speak my native tongue has caused my comprehension of English to deteoriate. I am out of sync with the North American world. I hardly watch English movies. I hardly listen to English songs. I hardly read English books. Writing this very sentence feels like its taking more mental energy then it would've back home. In Toronto, I was a very social person with many social activities to participate in and many people to talk to. My lifestyle of being in constant communication with the people I care about was the fuel for my mind staying imaginative and creative. As human beings and social animals, we are meant to interact and communicate with others so that we may learn about ourselves and the world around us. Socializing makes us aware, gives us valuable perspective, and keeps us sane. Teaching basic English to children 10-12hours/day, 5 days/week takes a toll on your mind and spirit. If I did not have my weekends to be SOCIAL, I would no doubt, go insane. However, each weekend, I notice my vocabulary getting more and more limited. I'm starting to stutter. It is becoming increasingly more difficult to express what I am feeling. Its so frustrating sometimes. On the other end of the spectrum, theres the Japanese language acquisition. I guess if I'm gonna start losing one language, I might as well learn another one.

Which brings us to Japanese class and the various other activities I find myself doing to compensate for my English loss. Class is great! I'm surprised at how fast I am learning this new language. Next month, my Japanese teachers are taking Aaron and myself to an Onsen resort. Should be interesting to say the least. In addition to that there are the Ninjitsu classes. Coooool is the operative word here. I have always enjoyed physical activity but these classes are taking my physicality to new heights. Unfortunately, they are going to be cancelled due to the lack of students but to compensate, a different form of martial arts will be taught at a different location(don't know which one yet). Moreover, theres the random solitary missions I take to sight see or shall I see people see. Minatomirai, Shibuya, and Harajuku are great places for shopping but even better, people watching. I usually bring my guitar, go to the local conveniance store, grab a few beers, and just sit in public writing songs about the wacky and wonderful faces that grace my way.

This past weekend I took part in the yearly festival of Hanami (cherry blossom viewing party). It was a very unique experience. Some friends and I and a frisbee went to a park in Harajuku filled with Sakura trees. The sight I saw was nothing short of an outdoor rock concert. There were thousands of people setting up picnic style under the trees. Everywhere I looked, there were people sitting in little circles eating and drinking the day away. It was amazing! An event like this would never be legally tolerated in Toronto. There were food and alcohol vendors throughout the park. At night, the DJs came out and everyone got into a tribal like, alcohol influenced stupor. I'm glad I was able to be part of this ultimate union of alcoholism and nature.

Moving on, let us discuss my new roommate, Agent Smith. Or as I like to call him, Hugo(Weaving). The other day at the office, he was dicking around at his desk. I told him that he should probably move to another cubicle so that he would not be in plain sight of the director while he slacked off. His response was that he felt a good energy about his current work space. I simply dismissed this eccentric comment and thought nothing of it. That night, at home he decided to elaborate on his 6th sense of picking up certain energies. "Sure", I thought. "Why not"? I'm a very open minded person who enjoys a good interesting, educational conversation now and again. I think everyone has at least some degree of extra sensory perception in them. Some people are just more in tune with the world around them. I should've just ignored him...He was abit too much for my cup of o- cha. Hugo went on to say that he felt a strong vibe from my bedroom since he first moved in. He feels as if someone is in my room even though I might not be. To make a long, weird story short, he runs upstairs, brings down a pack of tarot cards, lays them out in a pentagram shape on my bedroom floor and goes into a trance. I'm not one to discriminate anyone's personal beliefs but to just walk uninvited into someone's private space (my bedroom) and do something like that made me angry. But what am I gonna do? I live with this dude. As much as I wanted to headbutt him and tell him to get the F*** outta my room, I couldn't. I don't want to cause unnecessary tension. So after his "reading" of my room, he tells me that there are two entities living with me. A guy and a girl. I called his bluff and asked him to read other areas of my room of which I felt "strange vibes" about(besides the underwear gnomes,there is nothing strange about my room).He went to say some other random paranormal bullshit. ARGH!!!! Once again, my uncanny ability to attract colorful situations and characters is validated. BTW, like Schizo, he also teaches children...

On a lighter note, I'm gonna join up with the most popular band at my gig venue and be their frontman vocalist for a few shows in the coming weeks. Three Japanese guys and me. Lookin forward to it.

More to come,
ME

2006-02-20T09:09:00.000-05:00

Memoirs of a Teacha- Ch.4- SUPER SENSEI!

For as long as I can remember, I have had the luck of finding myself in fairly odd, fully outrageous circumstances. I don't know why, but if you are a close friend of mine, you can attest to this. I simply seem to have this uncanny ability to attract colorful situations and characters. At times it feels like I'm living a life straight out of a comic book. Here are just a few examples as of late.

Remember that crazy schizo house mate I had? Well, the company is firing him. Good call doing it before he went postal. Guess who the replacement is? Agent Smith of Matrix fame. Or Lord Elrond of LOTR. Either way, he looks like that actor, Hugo Weaving. This new teacher is from Australia and he plays Beethoven's 'moonlight sonata' in the music room of my crib non stop. I rented an indie flick called "Elephant" the other day. Its basically a movie made to make the viewer feel like they were present during the Columbine shootings. (wish I knew that before I rented it). My heart was aching after watching that. If you want to watch a powerful film based on an actual event, watch 'Elephant". Yeesh, what's wrong with the world? The musical theme of the film was "Moonlight Sonata". The freaky thing is, is that after I watched the movie,ironically Agent Smith started to play this haunting, depressing song over and over again. Kuwai!!!(Scary)

Last weekend, I went down to Roppongi (Gaijin Ghetto). This the area of Tokyo which caters mainly to that of foreign descent. It was the international duo of mayhem night. I was with my Cuba bro, Aaron. The itinerary? Bar hop! The first bar was pretty boring until a big taiko drum was hit. Whenever some drunken fool hits the big taiko drum above the bar, that individual must buy the whole bar a round of shots. Lucky for us, some American business man got drunk enough and decided to be generous. After our shots, we hit up a tequila bar. Once inside, I completely lost my bearings. You truly believe you are in Mexico, Cuba or some other exotic Latin spot. It was blowing my mind that just outside was JAPAN! This was no shot bar. Ohh no..this was as classy and lavish as they come. Only the finest of the world's tequila in this joint. You get your tequila in a wine glass amigo! To make things truly authentic, Aaron and I indulged our senses with some cigars-sipping and smoking the night away. It wasn't long before we both were feeling the effects of the alcohol. Its at that moment that my adventurous spirit kicked in. So out we went into the insanity of a downtown Tokyo, Saturday night. An interesting thing I noticed while walking the yellow brick road of Roppongi was the amount of Africans here. Literal Africans. Not African American or Canadian. Straight outta Nigeria. Left, right and centre these Nigerians were trying to get us to go into their clubs. Them and they're clubs looked way too sketchy for us. See for yourself. Then came the Thai prostitutes. We were just wondering the streets trying to figure out when our trains were starting up again when these two, old Thai women came outta nowhere and aggressively pulled us into their building. They were offering some pretty interesting services for dirt cheap. It makes sense cause they were pretty dirty themselves. After saying no, they started yelling and making a scene. One tried to reach in my pants for my wallet!?!? We bolted with them chasing us! Thank goodness for the sun because as it rose, they backed off. I think vampires exist here. And that was that.

What else do I do on my spare time? I joined a gym, a dvd/cd rental store and started Japanese classes. Haha, I also signed on for Ninjitsu lessons starting next month. GO NINJA, GO NINJA, GO!

Here are some random pix...

Outside most arcades you can find characters like this waiting to be photographed or kancho-ed.
I'm at the arcade brushing up on my dance, Dance revolution game when suddenly I see this sight!?!? I've seen many animals do many tricks but a freakin horse playing video games is a definite first. WTF,WTF,WTF!

Finally, some pix of what keeps me sane in this bizarro world.

Hero in a half shell,

EMRAH POWER!

2006-02-11T21:08:00.000-05:00

Memoirs of a Teacha-Ch.3- And in this corner,Team Kento!

Mushi mushi Mysteko fans! Its been awhile. I need to get myself some reliable internet stat! Been doing the teacher thing for about a month now and let me tellz ya, it ain't easy. I can't stress how ridiculous these hours are. Probably gonna do it for another 6 months or so then test out other options. Namely, travelling! I have missed snow boarding and south east Asia trips so far due to the strict conditions of this company.

As I am writing this, it is Valentine's Day and I am eating chocolates that female coworkers have given me. I could care less that they got nothing back in return! HAHA! Sorry, thats just the way I am-In Japan! Hai, Valentine's has somehow become really sweet (no pun intended) for men here. We are not expected to give any sort of gift to the women. Their time comes exactly one month later on a day called White Day.

Another wacky thing I noticed is McDonalds. We all know the great little promotional catch phrase of "I'm Lovin' It" right? Either the guy who invented that is a utter genius are a complete moron because that phrase is in use here too. However, the Japanese find it tremondously difficult to say "L" and "V". For "L" they use "R" and for "V" they use "B". So Lock becomes Rock, Vote becomes boat AND "I'M LOVIN IT" becomes.....The commercials never fail to knock me out with laughter.

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, TEAM KENTO!(MY STUDENTS!)-most of 'em at least.

7

Team Kento Out!

Haha....One of the teachers of the kindergarten where I do my assembly classes at took this. Apparently, this is me after those 5, 25 minute one man shows...

2006-02-01T04:58:00.000-05:00

Memoirs of a Teacha-Ch.2-Under the Weather

A thousand apologies loyal followers. I wasn't prepared for how busy I would be once my teaching started. On top of that, the internet signal my laptop is stealing has been acting real funny lately. So whats the dilly with me?

After holding it off for so long, Japan has won the battle of getting to me physically. For the past week I have been dealing with the symptoms of what seems like a common cold. However, due to the tremendous amount of stress and exhaustion I endure with my job, it feels much worse. As screwed up as I think the company I work for is, they seem to have a little humanity to them. I seem to be getting a lot of praise from the parents of my students so its only fair that the company showed a little compassion for me and allowed to take a couple days off. In addition to that ,I ensured that new students register when they made me to demo in a mall last Saturday.

Its raining, its pouring the children are probing.
He went to school and they punched his tool and he couldn't get up in the morning.

AHHHHH! These assembly classes are f***ing ridiculous. I do my thing. Sing my songs. Teach the lesson then at goodbye time, they all rush me and start punching mini me. But the icing on the cake is when they do KANCHO!!! Kancho is a game or trick often played in Japan by young school aged children. This weird ritual is performed by clasping the hands together so the index fingers are pointing out. The second step is to attempt to jab them into someone's anal region when the victim is not looking. I guess it can be compared to our wedgies. Nonetheless, after awhile, it gets annoying. What do the teachers of the school that I do my assembly at do? Giggle like the kids and do NOTHING. Theres an old fridge box in the storage room of my house. I think I'm gonna wear it the next time I teach an assembly class.

Under the weather in more ways then one: Its been raining non stop for a few days now. The other night I went to Shibuya(downtown Tokyo) to do my weekly club gig. Oh you don't know? Every Tuesday, I perform at an international club/bar and every Tuesday it gets better and better. Its my weekly therapy. Anywayz, because of the rain everyone was out with their umbrellas. From the station to my gig is the busiest pedestrian intersection in the world. Because of my height I had to duck down under all the umbrellas when crossing the street. I've never seen so many before. It was like I was in elementary school again playing under the parachute. Heres a pic. Some criminal activity was goin down that night too. Heres a shot of some cops that ran past me with their wooden swords?

Happy Chinese New Year! On Sunday I went into Yokohama's Chinatown (biggest in the world) for Chinese New Year festivities. It was pretty cool but way too many people.

First webcam shot:keeping a close eye on my door hoping the roommate doesn't pull a "here's Johnny" on me,

Kento Sensei

YIKES, I JUST FELT ANOTHER EARTHQUAKE. WTF!?!?!?!?

2006-01-15T09:57:00.000-05:00

Memoirs of a Teacha- Ch.1-The War, The Journey, The Japanese Bagpiper.

Gomen Nasai (Sorry), you'll have to excuse my tardiness for I have been extremely busy as of late. I have just completed my first official week of English teaching in Japan and am at home nursing my battle wounds. Wounds that I have attained during an epic war of good vs. evil. A conflict entrenched in the catacombs of history: The school teacher versus the school children!

Fortunately, I am well trained in the art of "immatura". They are honorable and worthy adversaries, but in the end, they succumbed to the power that is Kento.

That is my war name and the name that the diminutive demons call me. Given to me by elder Gods in the land of Tow-raan-tow, Kento translates into a being of immense will, mythical power, and knowledge of children's songs A-Z.

Moving on. Yes, my teacher name is Kento. Actually its not too far fetched. I was going to go by Emura. But Emura is an actual last name here, and the students found it confusing to call my first name by that. Next best thing? My middle name, Kent.

Every class thus far is indeed a battle. Its not that the students are particularly misbehaving. Its just the amount of classes I've been thrown into. Mr. Miyagi (remember him?) thinks I'm some sort of super-teacher and has given me the largest work load. 5 days/week.Sometimes 6. 10-12 hour long days. I have 4 locations I teach at. All more then 1 hour away from the office. I lesson plan in the office in the mornings then head out to teach in the afternoon. Or so it is for every other teacher. I only have 2 mornings a week to lesson plan. I need to use those 2 days to lesson plan for the whole frikin week! And let me tellz ya, it ain't easy.

Overall, I have close to 500 students!!! For 3 locations I rotate with during the week, I have about 70 kids that I personally teach. The other location is a kindergarten school which I do assemblies at 2 times a week. Each class has 35-60 students. Each assembly day has 5 classes. Here's a random picture of my marker board(cause it ain't chalk board?). Ohhhh, but wait till you hear the best part.

My sweet ride.

This baby can go from 0-60 in a lightning fast 10 missisispis. Compact like no tomorrow! An oompa loompa can only dream of such a vehicle. Except, I'M NO OOMPA LOOMPA! I sure feel like one though scampering in and out of traffic. Thats the cool thing. Small enough to weave. But overall a hassle. Remember that Simpson's episode? That tall dude in the little car Nelson laughs at? Tall dude=me. Nelson=Japan.

The other day I went shoppin and stumbled upon this spectacle. The local Firemen doing acrobatic maneuvers on a ladder.

Here's a sweet shot of a boat I took in the famous Yokohama port area.

This just in...Last night I had the fortune of playing a gig. As you all know, I am quite fond of the music. I enjoy to dabble in many an instrument. I sent some of my stuff to a Tokyo club and sure enough they invited me to play for an international crowd. A variety of cool and wacky acts performed. Yeah, it was a bitch getting down there and back. But once I got up and did my stuff, it was worth it. Sooooooooo therapeutic. This could be the beginning of something... Here's a pic of a cool dude I met named Shin. Phenom on the electric! And his complete opposite, Shamas.

The Saga Continues,

Kento

2006-01-05T06:56:00.000-05:00

Some Random Pix...

Action figures to spice up my room.(Gundam obsession beginning).

My buddy,Hayato.

Trip to Enoshima Aquarium with work friends.

Sampei(Junya) and Me.

Jeff,his girlfriend Christina and I.

Sampei's girl,Kana,her friends and me.

Razor Ramon HG, the most famous Japanese television icon right now.

I think I know what I'm gonna be for Halloween,

Bigu Torko

2006-01-02T05:33:00.000-05:00

TOP TEN REASONS TO VISIT THE IMAI FAMILY IN NAGOYA

10. The Shinkansen ride- Jimminy Jillickers!...These MOFOs are fast. Its no surprise that its also known as the Bullet Train.

9. The food- When they were not taking me to the many great restaurants, the Imai family could be found in the kitchen tirelessly slaving over more food for me.

8. The drinking- So the Imai family consists of Satoko(homestay girl), her husband, and her parents. I never had an empty glass of beer thanks to grandpa Imai. The beer was bottomless in their household. Grandpa Imai had a great strategy for drinking. After each drink, he'd nap for 10 mins, wake up, then go at it again. Its very smart because I guess he realized he gets gassy when he drinks. This way, no one can really blame him for farting because he was "alseep".

7. They live in Walt Disney's house- I didn't even set foot in their home when I realized that this is the house that Disney built. You see, the Imai household is a local attraction in the neighborhood apparently. It is featured every year in the local newspaper. The entire house from the outside in, is covered with Disney themed decorations. Bibbity, Bobbity, Boo, if I see Mickey again, I don't know what I'll do!!!

6. Cream Soda in a boot!

5. Rhino Beetles- I was chillin in my bedroom, tryin to understand yet another wacky variety show,when something caught my eye. It was shiny, dark in colour and big,very big. I tip toed to the closet where I saw it sticking out. Only to discover a collection of RHINO BEETLES. They were dead of course..but well preserved. Cooooooooool!

4. Central Japan International Airport. I know what ur thinkin. Yeah, an airport, big deal....BUT,the crazy thing about this airport is that it is entirely built on a man made island... sinking by the day. Eat that!

3. Flamboyant magician. While shopping with the family, we ran into this magician. He was doin some pretty awesome and death defying trix. One thing is for sure though. I may be across the world from home but a lisp will always be homosexual.

2. Temple for New Years. This is the reason why I initially visited Satoko and her family-to experience a traditional Japanese New Year. We ate and drank until midnight. After that, we headed off to a shrine to worship and pray for goodluck in the new year. It was a very educational experience. Sake and noodles were served.

AND THE #1 REASON TO VISIT THE IMAI FAMILY IN NAGOYA- The Onsen experience(Japanese Hot Spring). I don't know what to really make of this experience except that it was the one I'll most remember. Beautiful, picturesque hot springs to rejuvenate and unwind in. The catch? You have to be BUCK NAKED. The towel they give you is definitely a hankerchief. I couldn't cover anything with that. I know that I am maybe a little more endowed in certain regions than the Japanese but the amount of staring was ridiculous.

Back in Shonan,
Emrah

2005-12-28T06:14:00.000-05:00

The Squat and further insights...

Something has come to my attention recently... The Japanese squat everywhere and anywhere. Whether on the street, train, in the grocery store, or in the washroom, squatting is a staple of Japanese culture. As your reading this, ur probably thinkin "in the washroom?". Yesh, in the washroom. The Japanese style toilet is a very peculiar thing and is something that is taking much more time then expected to adjust to. The best way to describe it is to show you a picture of one. Its safe for you to assume that I have fallen numerous times. Its not that squatting is that difficult.Its just that the space is not designed for people with long legs such as I. Its nothing short of a spectacle each time I do my biznazz....All the squatting that the Japanese do in the bathroom trickles off into their everyday life I guess. It makes perfect sense now. Squatting in public simply is a cry for the nearest potty.

Another wacky insight is related to my long legs. I can consider myself maybe abit taller then average back home, but here I AM A GIANT. Fee,Fye, Foe, Fum, I smell the blood of a scared little Japanese granny! Because..... They are constantly tripping over my feet! Everywhere I go, ppl are tripping over me. I immediately try an apologize(Gomen nasai.Dai jo boo?) and see if they are ok but as soon as they see me, they have that "Ahhh, its Godzilla!" look and scamper off. I would say a good 30 ppl so far have tripped over me. Most of them, little grandmothers.

Well ,I am a couple days into my Christmas break now. I went karaoke for a solid 4 hours yesterday with Sampei and friends. Each time I go, the dream of being a J-pop star gets stronger and stronger.HAHA. Tomorrow, I'm taking the Shinkensen (bullet train) to Nagoya to visit a family friend for a few dayz. She had a homestay with my family when I was 4 yrs to 6 yrs old! Now, her family wants to return the favor. Instead of the whole goin out clubbin for New Years, I much prefer to partake in traditional festivities which by visiting her, I have the chance to do.

Wishing all of you a happy,healthy New Year,

Godzilla

2005-12-24T05:28:00.000-05:00

T'was the night before Christmas and all through the house,not a creature was stirring except for MY BLOG....

HAPPY HOLIDAYZ from Nippon!!! I am officially on my Christmas vacation here. 2 solid weeks of....ummm..errr...no work!?!? Yeah, I don't know what I'm gonna do. Boredom is slowly setting in. Although I do have friends here, they got their own lives as well. On top of that, the trek to them is brutal. I'm used to always being around ppl this time of year...That ain't the case now.....Too surreal of a feeling for me.

Its currently Christmas eve here. Because its mainly a Buddhist society, Christmas is not celebrated the way a westerner might think. As with the rest of the world, gift giving is huge here. The Japanese love their shopping. The difference with the rest of the year is that this an excuse to be extra materialistic. But the most predominant thing about Japanese Christmas is that it is a special time for couples to get together and go out for some KFC! Yep, the Colonel is like their Santa Claus. I have no idea why, but they go gaga for fried chicken on Christmas eve......Weird.

Whats my plans you ask? Sit in my room with my POCKY pretzel sticks and play guitar. I'm so sick of the food here,I'm not even gonna bother eating dinner. I got enough grease in me from 3 McDonald combos yesterday.

I went out to Tokyo last night. Nothin too exciting. Probably because the night was revolvin around sketchy substance dealings. Long story. Nothing dangerous. Just made for another boring night in a potentially exciting setting. This is a pic I took from a cab in Shibuya.

If you guyz don't already know, I live on a hill. Its quite the trek to the train station so I use this pink bike I found in the house. Down is fine. Up is not!

Anyhoo, I hope everyone enjoys this holiday season and gets whatever they wish for. I know what my wish is. To understand Japanese television!!!

Alone on Christmas,

The Grinch

2005-12-20T06:22:00.000-05:00

Round and round culture shock goes....

Where it stops nobody knows.... I am in a constant whirlwind of culture shock here. Everything is opposite from Canada! This is such a bizarro world for me. Too much to write about. Just know that I am half expecting munchkins to creep into my room and guide me to a yellow brick road because I am officially in Oz!

Give my regards to Auntie Em,

Dorothy

2005-12-18T04:37:00.000-05:00

At long last.Some pix...

I haven't been able to find a reasonably priced digital camera yet but I did manage to get a celly. These are some pictures I took with it. ..

This is a view of my bedroom.That earthquake helmet that sits by my bed. Ladies man, Sampei-san. And an underground hip hop show I went to yesterday.

2005-12-16T06:39:00.000-05:00

And in other news...

After only a week, Emrah is finding himself missing and yearning for loved ones back home. He is sad that he had to depart at a time of year where such sacred relationships are to be cherished and sought after. He feels he took many things for granted and wishes to express how meaningful these people are to him. His family,friends and a significant other made him who he is today and he could not be more thankful. I LOVE ALL OF YOU and wish you my best.

2005-12-16T05:39:00.000-05:00

Yay for Yotsuya!

Yesterday evening I had the pleasure of meeting up with my good buddy Sampei-san(first name,Junya). This week I have been training at the three different locations that I will teach at. Kamiooka, Honmoku, and Totsuka. All these places are pretty decent even though one of them is in the back room of a burger restaurant...Anywayz, yesterday I was told that it would be easier to meet Junya from Totsuka as oppose to Oppama (main city to where I live). Thankfully I had a cell phone in just case I got lost and boy did I get lost.(Yep, gave in to the cell phone craze of Asia. Its the cheapest I can find yet it can probably automatically open my car garage in Toronto from here!). I am in utter bewilderment of technology.Thats an another story.

Anywayz, got lost. As much of a western, developed society Japan is perceived to be, a vast majority cannot speak Eigo(English). I needed directions to Yotsuya from Tosuka desperately. I tested my luck with business men...To no avail. Then came the school girls...

Interesting subculture they are. Fascinated by the white man as well. Helped me they did(why am I writing like yoda?). It didn't take much. I simply showed them the directions Junya gave me and they did their best to put me on the right train. They couldn't speak a word of English. That goes to show you that a smile can go a long way. I got lost a couple more times. But each time I did, I turned on the old Turkish Charm and got by.

I met up with my boy Junya about an hour later. Yotsuya is a university town outside Tokyo. We went to a restaurant where his girlfriend and a couple other of his friends were. Great dinner and conversation. Why? Cause all these Japanese kids were English Literature majors. Yosh!

After dinner and drinks it was only appropriate that we went to... KARAOKE!!! This was my first session in Japan. We had a great time rockin out. I'm actually quite surprised with how familiar many of the Japanese songs were to me.Thanks Kei.

Missed the train back....Went to Kana's place with Junya(his girlfriend). Slept,went to McDonalds(the clowns name here is Donald not Ronald), had a teriyaki burger(ewwww, abit too tasty).Came home and relaxed. I have the christmas show I have to prepare for tomorrow. I'm playin guitar and hosting it with a local radio personality apparently.

Japanese television is f***ed up. The culture shock hits me hard with tv here. I don't get anything!?!? Right now I'm watching this scary, giant piece of poo dancing and singing...

Sumimasen(key word of Japanese society-means anything from welcome to sorry/excuse me),

Elmo(One of many fun and wacky Emrah pronunciations here)

2005-12-13T08:03:00.000-05:00

ohhhh yeah, and 4. the roommate- crazy 37 yr old schizophrenic, judo master, ex video game designer with the 12 yr old kid voice who says he was raised by wolves.

ummm,the music room is cool though.

2005-12-13T07:48:00.000-05:00

Moved into the house

Today I moved into my permanent residence for the year. Its a big, traditional styled Japanese home located in Shonan Takatori about 30 mins from Hayama. Its a teacher shared home. Theres 3 bedrooms, a kitchen, a tv room(with a nintendo 64 some other teacher left, YOSH!),2 toilets(one eastern?,and one western),and a traditional bath tub with yes,more skin chunks(mmmmm). My bedroom is straight outta a movie. It has those sliding doors with tatami matting everywhere. My room is downstairs and facing the south. It is goodluck to have your room facing the south apparently. One thing I forgot to mention in detail is the cold here. You may be thinkin"he ain't in Canada. how cold can it get there?". Yes,while its true it doesn't snow as much as Toronto, it can get bitterly cold here. So cold in fact that I am currently blowin out steam from my mouth. THERE IS NO CENTRAL HEATING HERE! Its a jagged type of cold that really gets to you. I pay for rent here plus utilities(water,electricity, and gas). I wouldn't mind paying for the shitty furnace in my bedroom if it wasn't for the fact that its broken! So today I bought an electrically heated blanket. Hopefully it'll bring the chill down. As I'm writing this I can't help but notice a construction hard hat sitting next to my bed. It is probably a safety measure. Why? you may ask. Recently it has been discovered that the Miura Peninsula(where I live) is on a major fault line actively producing earthquakes. So according to the other teachers, it is not uncommon to feel the house rocking.
My house:
1. No central heating=freezing cold,balls disappearing.
2. High probability of earthquakes.(btw the helmet has a dinosaur sticker that says Mattys school of English on it. I guess if an earthquake happened it would be reassuring to know that I can teach the English version of the word to people!?!?....some things I just don't get.
3. Bugs. There is a huge (literally) cockroach problem here. Especially in the summer time. They are about 3 inches long and can fly. There are also centipedes like those freak ass ones in your homes but here, they're jacked up on steroids. Don't get me started with the spiders that are the size of my hand! This is at least what the other teachers are tellin me about...

But...There is also a music room with a grand piano, two synthesizers, recording gear, and a mic!

Now thats justification.

Peash out,

Emrah

2005-12-12T18:32:00.000-05:00

Lets get down to business

As cool as my experience in Nippon may sound so far, my primary purpose for comin here is to teach some English. Now my contract is for 1 year so there was some bureaucratic bullshit to get out of the way.

First I went to the local Hayama city hall to get my alien registration card.Mr.Kyokuta(Miyagi) came with me to help with translation services(really didn't make a difference though-he may be wise in many wayz, but hes definitely senile)...One thing I noticed was that gaijins get special treatment.Anywhere I go to for a service, I get priority over the Japanese ppl who were there before me.(I've always wanted superpowers.In Japan my mutant gene is slowly maturing). Abit of a hassle.Paper work for government related issues are always in Japanese and I had to fill in everything myself. But pulled it off and now I'm a legal immigrant.

Then came time to set up a bank account. This was difficult. Already the money here is confusing. Converting quite abit of Canadian currency required me to muster up my math mind, which has been rotting somewhere near the bottom of my cerebellum for the past 5yrs.. After abut 2 hours!,got that done with. Then had to go to the office to meet the teacher whose schedule I'm takin over. I met more teachers as well.This one dude,is a strange character. A real nutjob. Something is missing,can't put my finger on it. Anywayz, hes been havin troubles at the company lately and is on two warnings. When I showed up yesterday and introduced myself, I guess he thought he was gonna get fired. When this guy was backin outta the driveway,he deliberately crashed into the other cars and sped off. He called the office and quit!?!?...Then he called back to apologize....This is the first impression of my roommate of my new residence-of which I am moving into today....

This week I am accompanying Alicia (the teacher I'm replacing) to her schools and am training with the kids. Driving is gonna be a headache. I can't stress that enough...Met some my kids. So far so good. The entire week is basically training.

Side note: Japanese people cannot talk with their mouths full. Everytime they try to whether it be a young or old person, food just comes spilling out. They think I don't notice....but it seems to make its way into my blog....

Kanpai!,
ME

2005-12-11T04:30:00.000-05:00

Boys night out (Nippon Mix)

Last night, I was able to meet up with 3 friends from my high school dayz. Junya, Kazuki, and Tomoko. It was great catching up with all of them. We went to a traditional Japanese bar (Izikaya) for sake and Japanese bar fair. But before I get into my Japan night out, let us go through my enchanted journey to meet them...

I was to meet my buddy Junya at the Yokohama train station around 7 pm. That simply meant that I had to find a way to get there from where I was,bout 45 mins away. Hai, I took the train. Mr.Miyagi was away at an onsen(hot spring) for the entire weekend and the Mrs. was busy christmas shopping. I briefly got minor details from her about the train trek before she left. It was a solo mission.And quite the mission at that.

I got dropped off at the train station by Mrs.Kyokuta before she went off to do her errands. Wow, I have never been so scared in my life. Numerous train lines and platforms marked this station.Where to get on? Where exactly to get off? How many stops do I have to go through to get there? Some how I found my way on to the right train. With the help of my pocket guide and a fellow Gaijin(foreigner), a Sri Lankan celebrity apparently?, I Got to Yokohama bout an hour later.Yikes, people everywhere.Lots and lots of them. How was I to find Junya. He wanted me to wait for him by the Sottesu line which was about a 15 min walk from where I got off(Thanks local chess team for guiding me the right way).

Found him and it was sweet. Seeing his happy face and hearing his jovial laugh was enough to make the trip justified. Anywayz, we met up with the rest of the crew and had a few reunion drinks.Btw, beer is sold everywhere and is legal to drink at all times-anywhere! Vending machines even dispense it. After we dropped off Tomoko, the boys wanted to show me Tokyo.

I don't think I'm in Kansas anymore. Sensory overload...Tokyo is insanity. Straight out of an Anime movie. The most A-typical cartoony city you've ever seen. My new name for it is Seizure City. So many lights, so little brain receptors to make sense of it all. This wasn't really a Tokyo adventure(that will come during the christmas holidays I'm sure). This was more of a sight seeing excursion from Kazuki's car.

We ended up chillin the whole night. We went to some cafe and had Japanese coffe and simply just caught up. I was in utter shock about the things they told me about Japanese society, This is a family blog so the most things can get are PG rated.Get at me if you want details...Not a crazy time.Just a kosher evening. Except for the fact that it was an all nighter...

Takin the train back wasn't so bad. Shinzushi station is where I had to get off. It was easy cause it was the end of the line.

I am currently writing this blog alone in the house. A very big, weird noises every second type house. I am half expecting to hear that Japanese kid "MEOOOWW" from the movie, "The Grudge"...Ok, that thought wasn't a good idea....

Freaking out,

Emrah^_^

2005-12-09T03:07:00.000-05:00

HAYAMA WELCOMES EMURA

Still jet lagged but gots to let ya know what the dilly is. So the plane trip here was bruuutal. Ridiculously long and boring. Toronto to Vancouver:5 hours. Vancouver to Tokyo:10 hours. Tokyo to Yokohama:2 hours. Yokohama to Hayama,Shonan:1 hour. Being greeted by Mr. Miyagi from "Karate Kid":PRICELESS!

Thats right folks. My boss, the president of Matty's School of English, Mr. Mitsuo Kyokuta strikingly resembles Mr. Wax on,wax off. This man of approximately 5 feet tall and 75 years of age effortlessly picked up my suitcases;each weighing 50 lbs. We then hopped into his jeep and headed to his home. I am a guest of the Kyokuta household until my house is ready tuesday.

The ride home was interesting to say the least. There is this fantastical GPS navigational system in his car which was supposed to get us from point A to B in no time. SUPPOSED TO. I made the mistake of trying to get to know my boss in the car. Thus distracting him and the directions.
There are toll booths everywhere on the highways. We passed the same one 7 times...

Anywayz, we arrived at his home where his lovely wife was waiting with warm cooked Japanese cuisine. After being shown my room, I was offered a bath. Japanese bathrooms are definitely confusing.. There is a traditional bathtub that must always have heated water in it. First you take a shower then you indulge your senses and unwind in it. Amazing... except for the numerous skin flakes and chunks floating around in there. You would think it was Goldmember's tub(dash a keepa).

Then came the dinner. Nothing eleborate but satisfying nonetheless. It was meat/vegetable fondue style. The appetizer however was seaweed jello in a homemade wine sauce(mmmm?).

Sleep was alright cause I was exhausted. There is no central heating in Japanese housing so it was pretty cold...but I had extra skin on me to keep me warm(ewwww).

I was woken up at the crack of done by Mr.Miy errr, Kyokuta to accompany him on his mountain walk. Yep, mountain. I am located between hills galore and the sea.

This was no walk. It was an iron man marathon. 2 hour long hike up this trail. This 75 year old dude in much better shape then me!!! At the top of the mountain, he taught me physical/mind strength training exercises.

I also recieved the schedule for the Christmas assembly they want me to help out with. Apparently there is a showcase just for me.An introduction for the new teacher. They want me to sing!?!?

Woah, gotta run. About to have dinner at a chinese restaurant to meet the other teachers.

lost in translation,
Emura

2005-12-08T09:18:00.000-05:00

Made it to Japan!!!
Well I'm here.Staying at my bosse,s house till mine is ready.....So much to write about the trip here...but so jet lagged.fallingg aslfeeps........talkkk to ay soon.

oyasumi nasai,
me

2005-11-14T13:00:00.000-05:00

Suhshi, Origami, Samurai, and the Blog...

This year is a hectic year for me. I'm taking a year off school (for reasons I wish not to get into).DAMN YOU BEAURACRATIC YORK UNIVERSITY ADMINISTRATION!!!....errr, excuse me. Anywayz, I took this oppurtunity to be a blessing in disguise. Being in school for so long has corrupted my outlook and mislead my perspecttive on life. Having this time off has allowed me to really get down to what I enjoy doing and not of what society expects of me. I have more time to concentrate on my music, which slowly and steadily is sounding very solid. Look for the EMRAH demo due out by January. I have more oppurtunity to upgrade my skills. I am definintely much more computer literate now. Overall, musical ability compared to this time last year is superb. I also have time to help out with the family buisness which is relieving alot of stress from the dad. I find in general, I'm being a much more productive member of the household not having to worry bout essays and exams. Although it is true, I find it a bit strange to not be in school before I'm officially done, I am going to milk it for all its worth. That is why I chose to travel to the land of the rising sun this year. Yes folks, Japan. I think that my qualifications are exceptional seeing that I have had leadership experiances with children for 10 years. And now after numerous applications and inquiries, an English Training facility in Yokohama has offered me a position. This a perfect time in my life to embark upon such a lucrative and rewarding excursion. I don't have a full time job nor a family to look after. I am taking a year off school and while I still can would like to gain some valuable perpsective on life and myself. What better way then travelling? It is overwhelming and daunting no doubt, but overall, I think a beneficial experiance for someone like me. Its great because the city that the school happens to be in,is the same city as two of my close chums. Lookin forward to the craziness that will undoubtably ensue round those wacky Japs. When I was younger, we had numerous Japanese students stay at our residence to study English here. The lessons on language and culture were something that they would never forget. Since finding out I'm leaving for Japan,I contacted two of them. Now they are looking to return the favour, allowing me stay with them and experiance the culture as they did while here. Now I'm just rambling. But all in all, I'm goin to Japan. Look for the Japan addition of the infamous Emrah blogs.

Sayonara bitches,
Emura jan

2005-11-03T12:32:00.000-05:00

"What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs Rolls over your neighbor's dog? What's great for a snack and fits on your back? It's Blog, Blog, Blog!

So here I am at my father's buisness. What do I do here? Well great you asked. I photocopy and fax and fedEx oh my. Its fun stuff. What I enjoy the most are the passport photos. The computer here is filled with all these weird,and wonderful faces that we've taken pictures of all these years for passports. I currently am scrolling through them all and am genuienly in awe of the human species. There are a good 1500 faces here. All creeds,colours and ages. I find it so amazing that toddlers have the same expression in their faces as the elderly.It really is quite intriguing. The little beady eyes, the scrunched up nose, the rosy glow. The similarities between the elderly and babies don't stop there. Most of your senses as babies are in their developmental stage therefore difficult to use.As a senior, your senses are in their detrimental stage where poor eyesight, arthritis and the like get the best of you. Notice in both examples the key word is MENTAL. We enter the world as mentally and physically challenged and we depart as mentally and physically challenged. Drooling,eating pre processed foods(mmmm strained peas),wearing a diaper,using a stroller are indictive of both stages in life. Spectacular how two people who seemingly have absolutely nothing in common with eachother, paint a much more thought provoking picture when placed in front of the eyes of a objective copy store employee.Anywayz, gotta get back to my passport pix. Making this old dude look like harry potter! I salute thee, photoshop!

peace in da middle east,
EKO

2005-11-01T23:54:00.000-05:00

Like a virgin, blogged for the very first time

Eh yo,its me your friendly neighborhood Emrah. Wow,i'm blogging.It feels like everything I thought it would be and more. Actually,it feels much less.I'm just writing here. Its not that special.I don't have any super powers or anything. I'm not peeing gold. Its not like i'm getting a free ride on a unicorn . Whats all the hoopla bout blogging anywayz...? Maybe if I start writing about my daily adventures,something might happen.Ok,here it goes.Well, this past weekend was the halloween party weekend(something is happening).My halloween festivities started on Thursday when I went to York University's infamous underground hangout,the underground (I feel a tingling in my tummy). I had no clue of what to be so I just put on this wig,makeup and hoped for the best.I got everything from pumpkin head to a pimped up scarecrow.It was alright chillin and dancin it up with ppl i dont normally chill with(woah,i just shot lazers out of eyes!). As with most nights of drinking, something embarrasing was bound to happen. This night thankfully wasn't that bad.Spilt my drink over a girl. Luckily, pimped up scarecrows can get away with such foolery...brb......YIKES!I just pissed out a diamond...On saturday, I went to the club, Phoenix. All I can say is that when you have Chewbaca taking shots with Big Bird, Spawn grinding with siamese twins, and a pimped up scarecrow harlem shaking to "monster mash",you got a party. Hory Cow!....or shall i say unicorn,cause one just crashed into my window. By the septer of gandalf!, this blogging truly is quite magical.Well i gtg,and tame this wild, mythical beast that has thrusted its presence upon me. I think I shall name it Erwin....
Till next time kiddies!!!

2005-11-01T21:52:00.000-05:00

glasses are fun!